trinkett | Third Dispatch. I have Advice. Written.

Third Dispatch. I have Advice. Written.

Dear Luceti,

My efforts to gain notice by the Malnosso Organization for my considerable human resources skills have not been enough, I fear.

To this end, I shall be offering my services free of charge: Effie's Advisements. No problem is too large or too small! We shall overcome -- together.

Most Sincerely,

Effie.

[That signature has a very elegant flourish to it.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Nonsense! Experiments show their enterprising nature! Drafts, their uncompromising strength! Both are boons to humanity. We should be thanking them.

Thanking them.

[Wow, lady. Wow.]

Somehow I don't see sending kids off to war or messing with people's heads as bonuses to humanity. At all.

It's the big picture the Malnosso concern themselves with! That's one reason I wish to work for them. I'm excellent at achieving big picture-type goals.

At the expense of innocent people suffering?

[Yeah, Zatanna's not going to be taking any advise from this lady ever.]

I think in my world, you'd end up being on the side I'd fight against.

No one is innocent.

[That is something they are taught early in the Capitol. At any moment, the Districts could rise up and wreak chaos on the carefully ordered world Effie had grown to rely on.]

And I do not fight. I am a Chaperone; an ambassador to the Districts.

Oh yeah. You’re definitely going to give great advice to people seeking guidance.

Nope. Maybe that’s what you were back in your world, but that’s not the way things work here. [Or so Zatanna’s heard. She hasn’t been around long enough to experience it herself, but she’s been told about the drafts.] If they call you to fight, then you’ll fight. Isn’t that the Malnosso’s way?

The Malnosso Organization is rational and scientific. If they call me, they'll place me where I can be of best use. They KNOW what I can do.

[And fighting is SO NOT IT.]

Uh huh. Because they’ve never put people who don’t know how to fight on the front lines or anything. I mean, you’ve been around here for a while, right? I’m sure you can’t think of anyone who got drafted that shouldn’t have been there.

Were they valuable in any other way? [Effie sounds like she already knows the answer to this. No. Not the way SHE is. Certainly, a child might be sent. An elderly person. A nonfighter. All of them cannon-fodder.

All of them very useful in that role.

But she, Effie Trinket, is far more valuable alive than dead, and she is convinced the Malnosso know this.]

Wait…you think it was justified? [Wow, lady. You just keep getting worse.] It doesn’t matter if they were “useful” at anything else. It’s still wrong to force people into a situation like that! And if you can’t see that, then you’re the one who needs to get some advice.

I think our first lesson could be "Ladylike Behavior." [This very final opinion of that statement comes out in a rather passive aggressive way.]

Or perhaps "Civility."