First Dispatch. How Utterly Dreadful. Voice.

[trinkett]

[Anyone who meets Effie in this post will meet her in full Capitol fashion and makeup. She landed in the shop, you see. A stiff turquoise-blue structured gown, fortunately, landed beside her.

And the wig -- thank the Senate! There were plenty of wigs and there was HER wig, tight and blond and curled and fabulous -- and the new violet wings sprouting from her shoulders were quite irregular but one never drew attention to one's irregularities. If anyone asked, they were Fashion. With any luck everyone who was anyone in the Capitol would be wearing similar ones, soon.

The makeup took a bit longer. Effie finally settled on green because green is one of her Power Colors and it IS almost spring, after all. She drew her lips in a pursed bow to reflect her dissatisfaction with everything.

It had only taken a quick readthrough of the Guide for Effie to grasp somewhat what was going on. It wasn't terribly shocking, but it was highly disappointing. She'd wanted to be in the Capitol for Katniss and Peeta, not transferred to a new post just at the height of a possible professional and personal triumph. Her charges were brilliant! Cinna had shown their fire to everyone. The sensation had been rampant and her promotion near-assured. Effie Trinket's star had been rising in the Capitol, the heart of Panem and civilization.

And then Someone had Bumped her. It was the only explanation for all of this business of waking up in a clothing store in what was obviously a cheap, outlying serfdom of Panem. A lesser woman would have called that Bumping Someone a dirty word, but Effie had dignity and would find other ways to trample that usurper into dust once she got back on her feet and back to the Capitol.]

Attention, Attention:

[Her usual rather chirpy voice is a bit tempered by the fact that she has only recently awakened in a clothing shop in a strange town.]

Would any available Peacekeepers in District Luceti please report to the Clothing Emporium? I repeat: any available Peacekeepers. The Diplomatic Escort for the Tributes requires a full compliment of Security. [Yes: she was still clinging to what she assumed was her now-stripped title and position.]



Thank you.

[[[[IMPORTANT NOTE: While Effie WILL be in full Capitol couture clothing and makeup for this post, some of my icons are simply those of her PB, Elizabeth Banks. I will probably try to MOSTLY use the icons from the Hunger Games movie but just assume she's all made up and dressed to the very weird nines even if you get a plain Elizabeth Banks icon! THANKS.]]]]]

Comments

[originaljackass]

"Enormous giants, Effie. The sort that could eat people like us in one bite. A cute babe like you would be pinky-sized to some of the giants I killed."

Most of the giants he killed weren't so large. They were all smaller than that first giant from the beanstalk. Uglier and stupider too.

"The battles are the things of legend."

[happyhungergames]

Okay, cute babe was a little...undignified. But Effie was willing to overlook that in order to be properly astonished at what he was saying.

"I have seen Tributes pull off magnificent upsets during the Games. I suppose it is feasible that one man could defeat a real, true giant. But I must still tell you that I am truly honored to meet such a celebrity.

Would I be able to watch these movies?"

[originaljackass]

"Well, the suits haven't made them available just yet. I'm working on lining up an exchange with them to procure the set." In other words, he was waiting for them to get back to him on a mission.

[happyhungergames]

"You mean the Malnosso?" Effie's voice was hushed with respect. "It would reflect well on them to make these titles available to the entire village. It feels good to feel!"

[originaljackass]

"My thoughts exactly. Stories like mine? They need to be shared. With everyone."

He wanted some damn respect.

[happyhungergames]

"Everyone," she confirmed, gazing into his eyes. Pretty eyes on a giant-killing man. It was a good combination. He would be SO popular in Panem.


He did need a haircut, though.

[originaljackass]

He would never have a haircut. But as they concluded that point, the Dome made itself known as they turned the corner and it was no longer blocked by rooftops.

"Here we go. The Battle Dome. The only real landmark to care about here in Luceti."

[happyhungergames]

"Oh. It must be somewhat like our Arena." She took in the sight of it, frowning slightly. "Except much, much smaller."

[originaljackass]

"Trust me, Eff. Chances are, you've never seen anything like this." He continued towards the domed building, considering what scenario might excite her the most.

[trinkett]

She tagged along at his side, willing and enamored of his status. "My entertainment is in your hands, Jack. Happily."

[originaljackass]

The inside was much more impressive than the outside. Even by the standards of her world, it was very futuristic, very sleek and clean. A complete contrast to the rundown village outside, this was just a glimmer of the kind of genius that the Malnosso offered. A second level with a glass floor was above them, with two elaborate staircases on either side. In the center of the room was a command console with an elaborate control panel and a large interactive screen.

"I know what you're thinking. It's better on the inside."

[happyhungergames]

"Glorious! The Gamemakers themselves would be pleased with this setup!"

Effie had once caught a glimpse of the room where the Gamemakers created Arena magic. It was an off-limits space. She'd had to scurry away quickly before anyone saw her.

"Color me thoroughly impressed!"

[originaljackass]

"You haven't seen anything yet." Jack set a hand on the control panel and the screen came to life, offering a multitude of options to choose from. "What would you like to see? Dinosaurs? The city? Another planet? Hell, we can go to Disney Land if you want to."

[trinkett]

"Disney Land?"

Take her to Disney Land, Jack.

[originaljackass]

"Disney Land it is." Jack punched in a few commands. For a moment, she'd get a glimpse of the magical world itself, but not enough to get a real sense of it. A chamber soon opened up, inviting them to come and look. He flashed her a smile before proceeding towards it. The magical world of Disney awaited.

[trinkett]

Effie stared about in wonder. It looked very much like the Capitol right before a major festival, or before the Hunger Games. Brilliant, bold colors, fanciful architecture, and...was that a monorail?

She sighed.

"A woman could get to like this place."

[originaljackass]

Jack, however, had been to this place more than once. It was fun, as Mundy things go. Not much his style.

"Depends on how much you like the rides. Though the simulated ones? Not as good as the real things." What's the point of a roller coaster if you weren't legitimately concerned for your life?

[trinkett]

Was he making a euphemism?

"Who are those people in the giant mouse uniforms?"

[originaljackass]

"People who have made some really bad decisions in life."

[trinkett]

"Is it some form of...punishment?"

She seemed interested in this.

[originaljackass]

"Self-inflicted punishment, maybe."

[inyourfavor]

Wow. That was very, very strange.

"Don't let me ever," she cautioned him in what were for Effie Trinket highly familiar tones. "The moment I show up dressed as a mouse with a polka-dot bow on my head, send me straight to the Arena. Weaponless."

[originaljackass]

"Babe, I'll strip search you myself, just to be sure."

[trinkett]

"Come now -- you're not a peacekeeper. Are you certain you are trained in proper strip-search procedures?"

[originaljackass]

"Trust me, Effie, I'm a pro at it."