trinkett | Fourth Dispatch: It's Not What You Think. Voice.

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Fourth Dispatch: It's Not What You Think. Voice.

Dear Fellow Residents of Luceti,

Wouldn't it be entertaining to put on some Games here in Luceti? Not that the Cultural Fair wasn't amusing, or any of the other activities going on here -- but true gladiatorial games. The pitting of one creature against another! Think of the thrill and drama and the release that goes along with that sort of entertainment! And here in Luceti we are ideally suited for a very exciting Games indeed.

Who would you sponsor or volunteer for this entertainment? Or would it all be...

[There is a pause here.]

Pokey-mans? I find human beings MUCH more interesting to watch, personally.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

FINE. If you're not interested, Miss....Whoever you are, then keep your nose out of it!

Doctor. Doctor LeBlanc. And as this would inevitably end with injured parties I am obligated to take note of this madness.

Yes, yes, you're quite big-hearted and concerned, I'm sure. [Doctors? Really? At a Games?] Perhaps you can be in charge of sending in medical aid to injured competitors. We don't want anyone DYING in this game.

We don't want the game-

[She swears.]

Have you seen the drafts? Have you heard of them? Or are you so self centered that they have slipped your notice entirely?

Of course I have! I think they are a very important part of what the Malnosso Organization is trying to achieve, here. And I also think my Games could be a wonderful preparation for them, in both body and spirit.

Preparation? Preparation. You know nothing of Vaskoth.

[There'd been no preparing for that. No planning for it. No game or camp or tactician could train for such a thing. Not a one.]

The Malnosso send us to fight because they must, and we go because we must. Here we rest, recover, and research. Here we are not put upon by others in our merry little cell to do the same. Here we are forced to endure more than enough at their hands for the sake of experiments. Whyever would anyone wish to do the same for the sake of entertainment?

Because entertainment is entertaining.

[Point? COUNTERPOINT!]

And catharsis is cathartic but you do not find everyone venting their emotions and frustrations on the village as a whole for the sake of it.

[Now THAT is laughable.]

I'm not venting. I seem to be the least emotional person here!

I was stating a fact, not making an accusation. Entertainment is entertaining, Catharsis is cathartic, socialization is social- that does not make every means and manner of handling them correct, proper, or sane.

I will be the better lady some day soon when my Games are put on with a flourish and everyone enjoys them! I promise not to say "I told you so."

I should expect them to be highly modified if the intent is to have all the village enjoy them, Madam.

I am not a butcher, whatever you may think, Madam.

[There they go, Madaming each other all over the damn place.]

No, that would take actual effort and talent on your part, Madam.

[She can do this all day Effie. All. MaDamn. Day.]

Madam, you have only barely seen the scrapings of the SURFACE of my talent. And my effort is tireless.

[BRING IT, FRENCHIE.]

You suggest, Madam, that there is more than a puddle's worth of substance to you in any manner aside from your ass?

[Six older, harpy sisters, Effie. SHE'S GOT THIS.]

What has my firm, YOUTHFUL, compact, and aesthetically pleasing hindquarters to do with ANY of the issues at hand today? Stop derailing, madam.

[Well EFFIE'S a MID-LEVEL BUREAUCRAT. SHE WINS RIGHT THERE.]

Aside from the fact that you are speaking out of them, Madame?

[Bitter divorcees eat bureaucrats for BREAKFAST.]

[Touché, Adele.]

How crass! Just because you're ashamed of your own slumping, going-on-middle-age backside...?

I do not know, Madame, Derek seems to care for mine just fine. A pity no one can say the same of yours.

You might ask Jack Horner a thing or two. He fancies me to be just right, madam.

I would not be so proud of having had a ride on the village bicycle, Madame. Jack Horner would bed a warthog if it wore lipstick-

...

Oh, well look at that.

[Wait what? Village bicycle? What strange grammar of sin was this?!]

Jack HORNER brought me to Disneyland.

[INSTANT WIN.]

[Now that is a peculiar euphemism. Fortunately, Adele can roll with it.]

So he had you ride his magic mountain? Did he make you wear the ears?

Ears? [Are you a LUNATIC or something?] Stop bringing your peculiar sexual fetishes into this, madam. People will continue to think you're strange!

Fourth Dispatch: It's Not What You Think. Voice.

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