Second Dispatch. Finally I Have Triumphed Over This Domestic Catastrophe. Action.

[trinkett]

[Effie Trinket has been sorely disappointed in Katniss Everdeen ever since arriving in Luceti. The girl seemed to have dropped all notions of propriety and her renewed place in the world as the Girl on Fire. No, here she seemed content to be muddy and sit on the laps of scruffy men and kiss

NO, that hadn't been a kiss. NOT a proper kiss! That had been a slobbery thing! Slobbery and licky! A slobbery slurpy licky thing!

KISS IN A RESTAURANT OF ALL PLACES. And live with that Sharpe person in what Effie could only describe as a cross between the District One Career Tribute Boys' Locker Room, a weapons closet, and a barn. The only thing she remotely liked about the place once she finally broke into it was the eagle. It would make a perfect wig stand.

With Katniss and Sharpe gone, Effie could take her time redecorating their house. The Welcome Center wasn't welcome in her life anymore. The only sense of purpose she could gravitate toward at the moment was Katniss. They could just deal with that when they got home from the battle. They would live like HUMAN BEINGS. Of course, she would have to prevent Katniss ever finding anything out about Jack Horner, but domestic bliss surely rested down this chosen path.

Feel free to run into her picking out properly upholstered furniture at the items shop, or other homegoods-type stuff. A lot of it will be in shocking colors. Most of it will look uncomfortable and gaudy.]

Comments

[trinkett]

"So I am given to understand. But I, Major, wish to work for the Malnosso at the top level. And I am hoping they can see how valuable I am before too much more time passes."

[greenjacketed]

....He was mostly just thankful they were no longer talking about how she was keeping her company. Some things, Sharpe suspected, should never be shared.

"Aye. You're valuable alright. We all are -- but not in any way we want to be."

[happyhungergames]

"I won't hear negativity!" she chirped right back at him, suddenly cheerful. "Eat, eat! Get those warrior-muscles fed!" She took a demure bite after admonishing him, making sure her mouth was comfortably full so she wouldn't feel pressured into talking on this subject more.

It was a subject she was feeling increasingly doubtful about.

[greenjacketed]

He stabbed the plate with his knife, at the very least refusing to go through the motions of a cultured dinner. No utensil manners here.

"Suit yourself. But if yer trying to fool yourself, you're only given yerself further to fall."

[trinkett]

"I am going to have to give you lessons on dinner-conversation etiquette, apparently."

[greenjacketed]

"Like hell you are. I've had enough of that bollocks in the officers' mess -- I don't need it here, as well."

[trinkett]

"Bollocks. You're WORSE than Haymitch!"

And THAT is quite an insult, coming from Effie. She presses her lips into a line through which no food will pass for the present -- only very judgmental sips of water.

[greenjacketed]

Oh. He has heard of this Haymitch fellow. The man hadn't sounded too awful, apart from that bit with the drinking. But Sharpe could even look past a flaw such as that. Harry Price was a terrible drunkard, but never failed to sober up for battle. Harris had likely ended up in the army in the first place because he drank too damn much. Of course, there had been others -- less commendable others. Slingsby

But he wanted to get under this woman's skin, so: "I'll take that as a compliment, aye."

[trinkett]

He's just come back from WAR, Effie. Be calm. Be a lady at ALL costs!

"I suppose you must always take what you can get," she replied primly.

[greenjacketed]

He shovelled the last scrap of food into his mouth. To the very least of his credit, he didn't speak with his mouth open. This behaviour had less to do with manners and more with his own inherent awkwardness. Sharpe would feel foolish spitting crumbs everywhere.

Eventually: "Only when it's worth getting, ma'am."

[trinkett]

Effie glared at him, and much in the same manner Katniss had done to her earlier, stood, stalked off to her newly-claimed bedroom, and slammed the door.

One wondered how much door-slamming there would be in this house in upcoming days. Probably a lot.